Mind travails and travels...
It has been some time since I blogged. I did think of posting on a few topics...topics which irritated me for all of half an hour, after which I decided not to harm myself further by staying irritated, topics which made me happy enough to undermine the futility of living through a day, topics which made me sad enough to realize that they should not be immortalized by blog posts...and finally topics on which I dug out information, which anyone can dig out on the web.
So, I did not blog. I visited other blogs a lot, which managed to slowly scrap at the wobbly foundation of my confidence, and made me wonder why people should visit my blog when they have such others to go to...which in turn made me wonder if people see my blog at all...and which in turn made me install a sitemeter, just for kicks...it has not really disappointed me so far.
So, I read a few books, which could not move me enough to type out a few sentences for or against...at least coherent, logical sentences...except maybe 'Whoever wrote this book is a person fond of self-piety or martyrdom' or else, 'I wish everyone reads this book'...and before I could expand, the feeling is gone.
Feelings...maybe I have found the cause...yeah, I did not feel enough. One of my friends has told me often, that when someone writes from the heart, it shows. And then, no matter how crappy the grammar, or how wodehousian the language, it stirs up something in the reader... especially if it is a simple situation, which everyone relates to. But if you are pretentious, it will show that you are trying to copy styles, or topics or situations or fonts...
And then, during times when I feel too much, too confused to sum up these feelings, and too scared to reveal them to others...I wish the blog was a diary...or I posted anonymous.
And so, this post has no subject, because I cannot think on a single subject...sometimes the mind is so organized, that it seeps into the fingers and prompts them to write, which brings a post on a single subject. Sometimes, the mind just wanders, and you let it organize the journey - this post is one such situation.
Once my mind decides to hover or settle down, I would do a proper topic-specific post. Hope that happens soon - I miss writing and all this journey gets too tiring.
So, I did not blog. I visited other blogs a lot, which managed to slowly scrap at the wobbly foundation of my confidence, and made me wonder why people should visit my blog when they have such others to go to...which in turn made me wonder if people see my blog at all...and which in turn made me install a sitemeter, just for kicks...it has not really disappointed me so far.
So, I read a few books, which could not move me enough to type out a few sentences for or against...at least coherent, logical sentences...except maybe 'Whoever wrote this book is a person fond of self-piety or martyrdom' or else, 'I wish everyone reads this book'...and before I could expand, the feeling is gone.
Feelings...maybe I have found the cause...yeah, I did not feel enough. One of my friends has told me often, that when someone writes from the heart, it shows. And then, no matter how crappy the grammar, or how wodehousian the language, it stirs up something in the reader... especially if it is a simple situation, which everyone relates to. But if you are pretentious, it will show that you are trying to copy styles, or topics or situations or fonts...
And then, during times when I feel too much, too confused to sum up these feelings, and too scared to reveal them to others...I wish the blog was a diary...or I posted anonymous.
And so, this post has no subject, because I cannot think on a single subject...sometimes the mind is so organized, that it seeps into the fingers and prompts them to write, which brings a post on a single subject. Sometimes, the mind just wanders, and you let it organize the journey - this post is one such situation.
Once my mind decides to hover or settle down, I would do a proper topic-specific post. Hope that happens soon - I miss writing and all this journey gets too tiring.
posted by Aparna at 2:11 AM
7 Comments:
I know what you mean. There are so many things that happen around us everyday, and I am sometimes motivated enough to start a blog post about them. But then I realise I have nothing worthwhile to add to it, so I leave the post unpublished. I have a bunch of draft posts sitting in my blog.
But then there are some days when so many things are struggling to get out of my head and be communicated to the whole world (or the miniscule part of it that reads my blog), that I make multiple posts in a day.
But keep blogging, no matter if what you have to say holds no interest for anyone except yourself.
Aparna,I must say that was a direct Dil Se post.Maybe it wasn't embeded with knowledgable links,may be it didn't have the intriguing commentry on daily happenings around the globe,but it let me know about the honest you and let me add that depicting that is no mean feat itself.Keep posting.Waiting for the next one.
Thanks a ton, both of you...it made me feel good reading these two comments :)
Sometimes it is good to have a little time to reflect. And I use my blog to vent my emotions. Since I don't use my real name it makes it trifle eaiesr to get things off my chest. And for the most part I don't write for an audience but to express myself. So take your time. Relax and let your heart out. Because sometimes all it takes is a push.
Nice post. Sums up the blogger-block well...
@M: I always used to wonder what your real name is...and now I wonder if I would ever know :) just kidding! Actually I blog for different reasons, but most of all because I am conceited enough to see my writing in print being displayed to everyone on a public site :) honestly..bad habit, I know.
@BM: You bet!
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