...as if am cycling after a long time....
It's been more than two months....that's regretful...what's even more regretful is that the moment I typed the word 'regretful', I thought I should use the dictionary to double check...and so it was that I realized that somehow I am unable to translate 'bade dukh ki baat hain' to english....
It surely feels as if I am cycling after a long time. It is as if I used to pass the old bike kept under the staircase, each time I came down the steps and opened the door to go out, and it will ask me, silently, "Today?"
I would stop, think, then shake my head and run out. No time, what will others think if I was awkward on it, what if the onlookers think that I am just being self-indulgent, what difference does it make if I don't ride it.....enough doubts to push me through another day.
And so it went on, till it has now been over two months that my fingers have not sought out the familiar keys on the keyboard, in fact, barring a few blogs, I have not even written comments on blogs where I was a regular visitor. The thoughts, which were always random, have now become clouded....one does not end before the other begins, and each one do not exist to fill more than a line, and they are tiring. And as I realized how technical I had suddenly become, I also realized that I was not really happy till I write. True, I don't write masterpieces, but then, how does it matter?
So, here I am, taking out the dusty cycle, and starting off with a ring of the bell on the handle...can't say 'I am back', because the next post might be a month off....but then, I am happy today....
To everyone who had been checking my blog some time for a new post....thanks a TON...here's hoping we meet up on this blog some time soon.....
It surely feels as if I am cycling after a long time. It is as if I used to pass the old bike kept under the staircase, each time I came down the steps and opened the door to go out, and it will ask me, silently, "Today?"
I would stop, think, then shake my head and run out. No time, what will others think if I was awkward on it, what if the onlookers think that I am just being self-indulgent, what difference does it make if I don't ride it.....enough doubts to push me through another day.
And so it went on, till it has now been over two months that my fingers have not sought out the familiar keys on the keyboard, in fact, barring a few blogs, I have not even written comments on blogs where I was a regular visitor. The thoughts, which were always random, have now become clouded....one does not end before the other begins, and each one do not exist to fill more than a line, and they are tiring. And as I realized how technical I had suddenly become, I also realized that I was not really happy till I write. True, I don't write masterpieces, but then, how does it matter?
So, here I am, taking out the dusty cycle, and starting off with a ring of the bell on the handle...can't say 'I am back', because the next post might be a month off....but then, I am happy today....
To everyone who had been checking my blog some time for a new post....thanks a TON...here's hoping we meet up on this blog some time soon.....
posted by Aparna at 10:39 PM
2 Comments:
Maybe my bike will talk to me! I'm sure it will make me feel very guilty for such neglect. I dream of riding it on cobblestone streets to the market to buy flowers and baguettes, even though there are no cobblestones in my town.
Well...then it hardly seems like your fault...because you want to ride it on cobblestones, and there are no cobblestones in your town...so how can you ride it at all? :)
I can picture the scene, so vividly put....as if it is out of a enid blyton book.
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